Our romance began 20 years ago when he still had hair. It fell out two years ago. I still have feelings for him, but I don’t know how to get past this. I have tried turning out the lights and even imagining I’m with somebody else. I’m sure other women feel the same way I do. He tries to conceal his baldness by doing the “flip over” thing with his side hair, so I know he’s self-conscious about it. But I am so turned off.
Can you give me some advice? I haven’t said anything because I don’t want to offend him. I am upset and discouraged and no longer look forward to seeing him because of this. It would be an awful reason to leave him, yet I can’t stand looking at his head! – TURNED OFF IN CINCINNATI
DEAR TURNED OFF: Ask yourself whether you are turned off by your boyfriend’s baldness, or whether it’s his attempt to hide it with the unconvincing comb-over. If it’s the latter, the solution might be for him to go the way of Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson or Vin Diesel and shave his head. However, if you truly can’t handle the fact that his locks have flown, then do him -- and yourself -- a favor and turn him loose so he can find a lady who appreciates him for what’s going on UNDER his scalp rather than over it.
Someone once said, “You can fool Mother Nature, but you can’t fool Father Time.” Aging, and the consequences it brings, happens to women as well as men. Keep that in mind as you consider jumping back into the dating pool.
DEAR ABBY: I am a 51-year-old married woman. I have a friend who is 68 and divorced. We have a great time together joking and laughing. However, lately I have noticed changes in her behavior that are alarming enough that I’m reconsidering our relationship.
An example: Today we went to a flea market and I watched her pick up and try on a ring. Then she pretended to return it, palmed the ring and slipped it into her pocket. I was shocked. I thought I was seeing things, but it happened a second time -- this time with a heart pendant. Next she stole a bottle of hand lotion, which were three for $1.
I know she has money, but she’s also cheap. I am appalled by her behavior and don’t know what to do. Do I tell her I caught her, or let it go and not shop with her again? I don’t want to be associated with a thief. Help! – NOT THE SAME IN THE EAST
DEAR NOT THE SAME: I, too, am concerned about what you saw, and no longer shopping with this friend is a good idea. Does she have children you can contact? Because these are “alarming changes” in the woman’s personality, she may need a physical and neurological examination to make sure she’s not seriously ill.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.